Conversations With A Hooters Waitress...

So Rennie, Joey, Carl, Randall, and I went to Hooters on Thursday for 99 cent draft night. As a restaurant it is subpar but as a place to go to have cheap beer, stare at girls in tight tops and short shorts, and have a conversation its pretty good. It starts getting interesting when the waitress joins in the conversation or when you push them into the conversation.

Heather was our waitress. She was pretty but the others complained that she wasn't really Hooters material. As a wise man once said, "I'd Do Her." She said she was 19 and was studying Biology. She knew nothing of politics when we asked her about the Israel-Lebanon wars just to piss her off, but when we asked her another question she really earned her tip.

We asked, "What minority can we do without?"

Heather said, "I wouldn't get rid of the Mexicans because they do all the work. I wouldn't get rid of the Chinese because they do a lot of things too like women's nails. White people are the majority. So I would get rid of black people."

This led to laughter around the table. That someone in the service industry would have the balls to say that they would get rid of black people made us giggle. We high-fived her and complimented her on her balls and she walked away, but we know that we made an impression that night.

Disclaimer: We at Dianosis do not believe that black people should be gotten rid of. This was just a stupid drunken conversation. And in fact the table agreed that Indians are probably the minority that could be done without.

Astray!

Haley Joel Osment SEES DEAD PEOPLE BECAUSE HE SMOKES THE DOPE!!!

...and drinks the alcohol...

Oh, and by the way, according to my blogger thingy, my post is the 667th post on Dianosis, which made neto's "snakes in my pants" <---WTF?? post the 666th post, so congratulations, neto, for being an evil bastard.

Snakes In My Pants...

The most talked about movie of the summer is being released this week. That's right its Motherfucking Snakes On A Motherfucking Plane. Now the movie is guaranteed to be crap but the question is whether it will be so bad its good or so bad its bad. Another question is: How long can one person sit through this movie without going insane. The Alamo Drafthouse is looking to find out by hosting a Snakes On A Day event. You go and you sit through the movie over and over for 24 hours straight and you get to watch it for free. But if you leave after the first screening you have to pay $1000. If you leave after the second you pay $500, if you leave after the third you pay $250 and so on. All the money goes to charity. I think this is a great idea but I would never take part in it. I don't have $1000 and I think that watching Samuel L. Jackson yell at snakes for 24 hours would cause my ears to bleed, but to all that are brave enough to attempt this I say, Courage!

Time to talk about the terd in the punch bowl.

or elephant in the living room, whichever you like.

So, by now, i'm sure everyone has heard about the terrorist plot in England. We're all digg readers and have probably read some of the constant slew of retarded posts that have come along with it. Many Anti-bush, many Pro-Bush, many posted as inaccurate. One thing we can all agree on is that there is a lot of fifteen year olds roaming on the internet, and that some of us really need a hobby(i've been wanting to take up woodworking). I have noticed that a lot of anti-middle east sentiment has risen up again. Which would probably be natural. Now, I do not agree with a lot of the president's policies, I also giggled when he called the extremists "Islamo-facists", but I really do believe we are once again escalating into a society that is giving up more freedom for a false sense of security. I realized this when I did not feel safe at all once I read the article on friday. I also believe our administration is dealing with extremists erroneously; but I also do not believe that any other administration would do an entirely better job. Although I do make my dissapointment in this administration public (as we all know). I also believe that this administration gave up on diplomacy too fast. Now, you're probably thinking "America is not a nation that negotiates with terrorists", yeah, I know. But it is clear that using force will not make them go away. Good examples are England, Spain, Ireland, and Russia. I'm also not saying there won't be times when force won't be necessary, but having to resort to "creedy's black bag" all the time to me sounds like a bad idea altogether.

tunak tunak++::...

and who says all middle easterns are bad? if only we had more of them in the streets the world would be a better place.

cheers

Tiger

For those of you new to golf enjoy....
click here

or here for a differant view

Eat Milk !!!

Gtg bYe

I'm a Wii!

Wii VS PS3

Forever Young

You know who pisses me off?
Madonna, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, ACT YOUR AGE WOMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kansas City

So im driving home from kansas right and i see this .....














so of course seconds later i imagined this

Now i'm a liberal, I know that, damn near a socialist, only not

but when you read something like this,

come on.

http://www.revistazocalo.com.mx/texto.shtml?cmd[14]=x-14-16fbc392e50713a870e9bfdf526bf09a&cmd[23]=c-2-78

oh and Apple has a new OS

its called LEOPAAAAAARD!

Myspace has gone too far

click here, you'll understand

For those of you who use Google Homepage

I personally Love it
Heres a picture of mine looks














if you guyz took the time too look at mine youll notice the BLOG on there

the following button will add if for you guyz

Bad News For Mel Gibson...

The Jews rule Hollywood.

Recently Mel Gibson was caught drunk driving and when confronted by the police he went to on to spout anti-jewish comments.

Now this doesn't really matter but it seems like something good to post along with this:

Greatest Hits: Danyela

And Danyela should post again.

I want my pizza now!!!!!

I read this article in today's paper about a delivery guy so cool he even delivered pizzas after he received a gun shot wound. All I can say is that that guy must really like his job or he hates it so much he goes to work stoned and didn't feel a thing. Anyway check out the article. This guy deserves a raise!!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/8145344/

Ciao

Greatest Hits: Joey

Joey should post more.

Boy Scouts Have a Bad Month

Seems the Boy Scouts haven't been very lucky this month.

Lightning Strike

Heat

Electricity

and some Girls Scouts had to be rescued from a river.

I don't know what they did, but I believe the Scouts have pissed off Nature.

Greatest Hits: Diego

Another easy one. I remember reading this. Then laughing for like 5 minutes.

345.1.6

DO NOT READ
...SNAPE KILLS DUMBLEDORE

one...

Greatest Hits: Fredo

So they finally came and fixed the phone line at my house and while I missed the blog's "official" birthday, I'm back to finish off the greatest hits series. This is Fredo's Greatest Hit. It started off a good conversation which led to it being the post with the most comments with 19. HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY BLOG!!!!!

UPDATE:: Actually, as Carlos pointed out to me, there was another post with 21 comments. It was a discussion on movies started by me. This still is a great post and a good discussion. http://cronuslags.blogspot.com/2005/06/why-i-dont-want-to-watch-cinderella.html#comments

student-athletes::...

Ok, so at first glance I always thought athletes in this university have no brain. Now I am assured that they in fact have no brain.
Now here at work we have the lost and found cabinet, and in it I found an almost empty notebook that I intend to keep. Inside it, I found the GPA of one of our athletes. And its no surprise that it’s lower than a 2.0 and according to its attached transcript and letters he is not on academic probation. Strange isn’t it?
Furthermore here is a direct copy of the letter that was inside with the transcripts by a woman named Leslie Schuemann and a guy called Jason Henderson directed to all faculty advisors:
“Attached are the transcripts, degree plan and advising sheet for the student athlete. Please advise the student-athlete during early registration for Spring 2006. if the student-athlete has reached the fifth semester and does not have a degree plan, please assist the student-athlete in obtaining a degree plan and returning it to this office. NCAA guidelines require each student-athlete to complete a minimum of twenty-four degree accountable hours a year. Your advising expertise is needed to ensure this regulation is met. Thank you for your assistance and if you have any other questions you can reach is at extension 2500.”
(For all you spammers and whatnot, their phones are 361-593-2500 and their fax is 361-593-3488)
I mean, the “student-athlete” a word they mention like fucking 5000 times, is so mentally challenged, (ok fuck it, retarded, probably still in its anal stage) that he needs the university to hook him up with a major, financial aid and an advisor so that he can continue being a failure. Yet in this university failures are paid to go to college.
Which brings me to my debate of, why are athletes treated as gods when they do nothing for the benefit of humanity. They are just a placebo to forget about how fucked the world is, and yet they are overpaid and uneducated and take away the chance that someone smart and who really needs money to go to college away.
I say fuck their privileges, its not as if they’re doing research. To me they’re just a bunch of steroid pushing assholes who think they’re superior for handling a ball. Monkeys handle balls, and at the same time, distinguish shapes and can play monopoly. I prefer monkeys, its just me. Monkey.
cheers