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Anybody still reading this? If so post a comment please!! Damn TWITTER!!! :(

sunday...

i have realized that i have become a video game junkie... i went to game stop last week feb 21st to be exact and demanded to get Star Ocean: TLH the guy at the store goes... "we don't have that yet" and so i reply "yeah i know but like you don't have it in the back or something" so the guy tries to look cool in front of his buddies and says "whoaaa it does not come out until next week..." so i interrupt and say "yeah i know march third" so he proceeds "and if we had it i would not be able to sell it to you it would be illegal" so his buddy replies "you could get fired" at this time i'm like wow did this just happen... so my nephew who i asked to meet me there so that i could buy him GOW2 cuz it was his bday has the same facial expression as me... the guy is still worried about his job and loosing it and all this and that so all i say is "dude, shoul've gone to college"

well two days later i go to another game stop and guess what i buy indeed on feb 23 i bought Star Ocean: The last hope!!! indeed i felt like a nerd... the game is cool but the way they designed the story kinda sucks the play it's aite...

street fighter on the other hand, wow bad ass game that's all i have to say about that...

Fan F'ing Tastic Funny Post Contest!!!

I'm gonna Mail '20' bucks to whoever posts the most original funny post. Like when I say funny I mean I gonna take a picture of my underpants with the yellow piss on it to prove that I pissed myself laughing. That funny. Okay the game is on! Eat Milk. Gtg bYe. -- Carlos

Tips For Clueless People Who Get Mugged

So you've just moved into a new "gentrifying" neighboorhood that's full of urban culture, cheap(er) rents, and wonderful friendly people. An odd lack of organic food stores and greenmarkets, but you can't have everything. So one day you're doing something FUCKING RETARDED like walking back from the store alone at 1 am or walking home from the subway while texting your sorority sisters back in the fucking midwest or something while SIMULTANEOUSLY listening to an ipod with the bright white headphones and you get fucking mugged. Congrats, YOU'RE A FUCKING DUMBASS. No, it's not 1990, when men where men, crackheads would fucking cut you and the robbery rate was about a billion times higher than it is now, but it's still new york and you were still fucking dumb enough to think that paying $1200 for a studio in a shitty neighboorhood is somehow hipper than moving to fucking Queens.

Anyway, here's some helpful tips for the next time someone jacks your shit.

1) Pay attention. Granted, you weren't paying attention to start with or you wouldn't have gotten mugged, but now that you've been hit from behind / had a gun shoved in your face, pay attention.

2) Follow directions. Give the friendly mugger what he wants. Don't talk back or fight. In all likelyhood, you're a pussy hipster retard, and are, by NYC law, unarmed.

3) You've been paying attention right? Remember some simple things in this order: sex, clothing color, clothing type, headwear, and direction of flight.

4) Congratulations! You've just been robbed and you're still alive. What now? Well, don't go back to your apartment and call the cops thirty minutes later. Don't call your mom in Kansas and tell her first. CALL THE COPS AS FAST AS POSSIBLE. You'd be amazed at how many people fuck up this simple step. Pay phones still exist as do 24/7 bogies. Go there, call the cops.

5) It may take a while for the cops to show up. The 911 system, at best, will result in a five minute wait before we're even notified. Then we have to drive there without killing anyone. Be patient. For that matter, tell the 911 operator exactly where you are. Nothing makes a responding cop happier than having to scour the area for your dumb ass while the perp gets away.

6) Resist the temptation to curse/complain/bitch about the cops while you're waiting for us to show up. We're probably busy. Even if we're not, don't expect us to come tear-assing across the precinct lights and sirens to get to you 2 minutes sooner. I have no intention of broadsiding a livery cab and getting fired just because you got your sidekick took.

7) When we do arrive: get in the car, tell us what they looked like and where they went. Something simple. "AGE/RACE/RED HOODIE/BLUE JEANS/NORTH ON BROADWAY" Really all we need.

8) We are now going to "canvass". Get in the fucking car. We aren't going to get you shot you fucking pussy. Also, comments like "I can't believe this happened to me" or "I'm in shock" or "OH GOD WHY"- shove it. Save it for the bar later. If you haven't actually gotten shot, shived or stomped grow a fucking pair and close your mouth.

9) We are now going to drive around and try to arrest someone. Quick con-law refresher for the lib hippy types: if you're in my car, and have given me a description, THAT MEANS WE ARE STOPPING PEOPLE WHO FIT THAT DESCRIPTION. If you told me they are violent or armed, it's probably going to be a felony stop. So when you tell me it's a 15 year old black kid in a red hoodie with a silver pistol, don't be surprised when the car slams to a halt and we jump out and stop a 15 year old black kid in a red hoodie. I am not violating his rights, I am not hassling him because he's a minority. I'm stopping him because YOU GAVE US HIS FUCKING DESCRIPTION. If the kid is not the one who robbed you, he'll be on his way in five minutes. On the other hand, if he is the one who robbed you, he may decide to run/fight/pull out a gun - you don't stop suspected armed robbers by asking pretty please. If this offends you, get the fuck out of my car and go find the guy who mugged you yourself.

10) We failed to find your robber. No surprise: they've probably done this before and had an escape route all planned out. They were probably back in their apartment / subway / taxi before you even called 911. Don't bitch. It happens. This isn't Law And Order.

11) Yes, you are coming back to the precinct to make a fucking report. I'm sure the CO, Kelly and Bloomberg would be fucking thrilled if you didn't make a report as this helps the compstat stats (you watch the Wire, right?) but if I did all this fucking work, you're taking 30 minutes out of your day to make a god-damn report. Also, after you've finished venting about how we're all corrupt, racist, incompetent morons who probably got bullied in High School, you'll remember that you need a police report for your credit card companies, and you'll show up the next morning with a sheepish expression and ask to make a report. Let's do this now while the memory is still fresh.

11a) "You'll never catch the guy", "I don't remember much" and variations thereof are just insulting. Our detectives have been doing this job for years, and despite what TV/Movies taught you, only a small fraction are burned out alcoholics. They probably are going to catch this guy... eventually.

12) No racial language please. The odds are good you just got robbed by a black or hispanic male, and your buried-deep racism may be bubbling to the surface (especially if you're an out of town transplant / college student). The majority of the co-workers on my shift and in the DT squad are minority. It's embarrassing when you use racial slurs in front of them. Amazingly, most cops aren't racist, although we do have a universal contempt for crackheads, gang members, and dumbass white people.

In conclusion: Don't be stupid, pay attention, call the cops, and don't be a dick.

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Narcisim, Masturbation or Homosexuality?

ok so... a couple of guys at the office have this question and i came to the conclucion that this would be the best place to discuss it....so here we go...

if you go back in time, and you have sex with yourself, is it Narcisim, Masturbation or Homosexuality?

O the scientist++::....

so since we put song recommendations that i doubt get observed i will try and sway you to a band that's rather cool.
the band is called Forgive Durden and the cd is Razia's Shadow A Musical
its literally a musical with so many musical guests including the likes of casey crescenzo (from the dear hunter), max benis (say anything), chris conley (say anything), lizzie huffman (man in the blue van), brendon urie (panic! at the disco), nic newsham (gatsby's american dream), john gourley (portugal the man) and many others.
point being, the cd is a masterpiece, i cant even get enough words to place what they did with music, its just a great balance of symphony, vocals from every angle at the same time and a badass story.
heres a piece from it, the second song of the cd after the intro...the song is "the missing piece" lyrics are below it....

THE M I S S ING P I ECE

AHRIMA

What a splendid mess He’s made of this. O The Scientist and His Genesis.
He overlooked my gift and benefit. She’s the only one who knows what I
could’ve done.
I must be patient. They will realize what I know inside. I was meant to
lead this world to greater things. It’s my destiny.
Everything seems to fade when I see her face. The sky and trees all blur
every time I look at her. Nobody understood me ‘til her eyes fixed upon
me. My puzzle life’s complete now that I found the missing piece.

NIDRIA
Don’t you worry, boy. It’s a waste of time. Place your hand on mine. Untie
your mind.
We’ll just float away into the day. You’re not the only one who thinks
they’re falling in love.
You must be patient. They will realize what I see inside. You were meant
to lead this world to greater things. It’s your destiny.

AHRIMA
Everything seems to fade when I see her face. The sky and trees all blur
every time I look at her. Nobody understood me ‘til her eyes fixed upon
me. My puzzle life’s complete now that I found the missing piece.
You’re the meaning. Nidria please listen, I’d like to explain. I should have
told you sooner, it’s been gnawing at my brain. My mind’s in knots, it’s
got me lost. Please help me through the maze. You’re the key. The lock,
turning. The breaking of these chains.

NIDRIA
Everything seems to fade when I see his face. The sun and stars turn dim
every time I look at him. Nobody understood me ‘til his eyes fixed upon
me. My puzzle life’s complete now that I found the missing piece.

AHRIMA
Everything seems to fade when I see her face. The sky and trees all blur
every time I look at her. Nobody understood me ‘til her eyes fixed upon
me. My puzzle life’s complete now that I found the missing piece.

Naration
Ahrima, the most gifted seraph, the utmost skilled of the cherubs, he felt
his aptitude and sleight were being misused, shamed. He repined this to O
The Scientist, who replied with a calm face, expressionless.

AHRIMA
Dream with your eyes closed. Try and pluck the pearls from your bones.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::..
enjoy
cheers

Obama

Opie and the Fonz want you to vote for Obama.

See more Ron Howard videos at Funny or Die

Also Matlock is in it. So he's going to get the old vote.

hahahahah

I was reading an article I found on digg. I laughed so hard when i read the last line!!!


If he wins, however, there will be a different challenge. He will have to return, full force, to the inspiration business. The public will have to be mobilized to face the fearsome new economic realities. He will also have to deliver bad news, to transform crises into "teachable moments." He will have to effect a major change in our political life: to get the public and the media to think about long-term solutions rather than short-term balms. Obama has given some strong indications that he will be able to do this, having remained levelheaded through a season of political insanity. His has been a remarkable campaign, as smoothly run as any I've seen in nine presidential cycles. Even more remarkable, Obama has made race — that perennial, gaping American wound — an afterthought. He has done this by introducing a quality to American politics that we haven't seen in quite some time: maturity. He is undoubtedly as ego-driven as everyone else seeking the highest office — perhaps more so, given his race, his name and his lack of experience. But he has not been childishly egomaniacal, in contrast to our recent baby-boomer Presidents — or petulant, in contrast to his opponent. He does not seem needy. He seems a grown-up, in a nation that badly needs some adult supervision.


http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1853025-5,00.html

Poverty

Today is blog action day, and the topic is poverty, so I figured I'd write something about the said topic….

How do we rid the world of poverty?

I don't think this is truly the question of we should be asking ourselves, but rather how do we improve the lives of everyone else. Poverty, sadly, will always be around because the economic principle of scarcity applies; resources of all kinds are scarce. To put it simply we do not have enough resources to produce all of the goods and services that anybody might like to have. Some of us may not know it, but clean water is a precious resource. A lot of us do not realize the advantage we have when we are able to drink clean water straight from the tap. I remember living in a place where clean water was privatized. In order to drink any water I had to buy two five gallon jugs on a weekly basis in order to have a drink. This wasn't really a big deal for my family who was middle class in Mexico. But for the poor families, clean water can put a strain on your budget. It would cost roughly 5 dollars a week to refill those jugs of water. In a place where roughly 40% of the population makes $550 USD annually, that is a big deal. In Mexico you can literally have a billionaire stand right next to a beggar. You can have state representatives with lavish salaries (USD $85,000 and more) and yet their constituents with only dollars a day. The income inequality gap is wide in Mexico. Although growing up in a border town opened my eyes to the hypocrisy of both countries.
I finally was able to move to the USA when I went to college, and this move opened my eyes to the income gap between the 50 states. We had a minimum, barely living wage of $5.15 an hour down in Texas, while New York city at least had a $10 dollar an hour minimum wage. We could justify this inequality with saying that New York has a higher cost of living than Texas, but even then I don't understand why Texas doesn't raise its minimum wage to better suit the needs of its working poor. I find it a ridiculous that a guy working full time retail in New York can make more than some salaried employees in Texas. I know what some of you might say, that if we raise the minimum wage, that things will become more expensive, and that by raising the minimum wage we'll all have to pay more money for essential items. Yes, this is actually true, raising the minimum wage to a workable living wage will inflate the economy, but the past few years we have seen our economy inflate without the minimum wage increase. This means that people have gotten poorer and were able to afford even less with their meager wages. Also if you increase minimum wage, right out of the bat you increase consumer spending. Families are able to afford more. This automatically puts more money into liquidity, thus combating inflation.
Really there is no way to rid the world of poverty. The rich will always be there, they will always control the majority of the world's wealth, in fact, I am sure even if we spread the wealth of the richest 1% around we would probably still have poverty running rampant. It is something we will always have to deal with as a world with limited resources. So how does one help those in developing countries, or even in a developed nation who are not as fortunate as the rest of us? In my humble opinion there are 5 simple rights that every person must have as a human being. These are not guidelines, these are not privileges; these are rights. Human rights, self evident, that we as a species should observe. When we see a culture, a city, or a nation that is being denied these rights, it is our obligation as human beings to stand up and demand of our leaders to preserve them. There are of course more rights that every person deserves, but right now I am only speaking in the context of poverty and how to get rid of it.

• 1. The right to food.
  
  There is something wrong in the world when we have people starving in the world, yet here in America we have poorer states suffering from Diabetes because of high fat food and lower quality foods, and the richer states having less of a problem with their weight. I swear only in America could there be such a thing as a peanut allergy.


• 2. The right to shelter
  
  Everyone in the world needs housing, if you cannot afford housing, there should be adequate government programs that house you and help you afford housing. I heard there was this great program in Australia that helps couples buy their first house by giving them money for their deposit. I think that is amazing.


• 3. The right to universal healthcare, affordable/free, and of quality
  
  I cannot believe this is even an issue in America. Healthcare is not a privilege, it is not something only those who cannot afford it deserve, and healthcare is for everyone. A doctor should be able to help anyone and everyone, and should not be getting flack for it from some insurance guy. The system in America is disgusting and should be rectified immediately.


• 4. The right to clothing
  
  this is pretty self explanatory, everyone deserves clothing, and new clothes, also not just those who can afford it. I find clothing to be the prime example of what's wrong with the world. Glorification of people who do absolutely nothing (Tommy Hilfiger, Ralph Lauren, and Calvin Klein) whose worthless product drives prices up making it hard for people to afford the things they need. Lets not forget that people like Ralph Lauren are worse because they market their product as quality when in fact they're no better than wal mart clothing.


• 5. The right to life
  
  This one is a bit general, but it means just about anything it could mean, everyone deserves the right to work, and if unemployment is too high, they deserve help from the government, they deserve the right to defend themselves and be given a fair trial and adequate representation from a competent lawyer, you shouldn't only be able to have a good lawyer if you can afford one. Also Habeas Corpus applies to everyone, not just Americans, everyone. Finally, if you are wondering if the right to life applies to a sperm that's reached to an egg…I'm not touching that with a ten foot pole. I personally believe in a woman's right to choose.

So there you have it, these are the five simple rights that every person must have in this world. If ever one person be denied these rights, it should be criminal. If we look away, then we are culpable as well.