Another Movie Review...
Oceans 12 sucked with a capital Suck.
Forget that the actors seem like they showed up to this movie so they can hang out together and get a paycheck. Forget that it really isn't funny even when it tries to laugh at itself. Forget that the heists were not anywhere as creative or interesting as the first one. The plot in mathematical terms cancels itself out. WE start the movie because Benedict (the bad guy from the last movie) finds everybody and tells them that he wants his money back (he LITERALLY finds everybody, as in they showed us how he talked to everybody). Somehow he has gotten all their identities and it seems like someone ratted them out. So they have to go to europe perform a couple of heists to get the money to pay him back. Yuo got that so far? OK so they go to Europe and spend the first hour of the movie planning and executing the first heist. We then find out that that planning is pointless because the guy who ratted them has already done the first heist. He did this because he wants to prove himself the best thief so he issues them a challenge. A second heist. So they spenmd the whole next half hour planning another heist which fails before it starts and the half hour after that executing another heist which seems to fail. Then they pull the rug from under us by telling us that they already pulled the heist before they failed to execute the two heists that took up the second half of the movie. Therefore they made the entire second half of the movie completely pointless. This earlier heist happened the least clever way possible. So we get one clever yet failed heist. Another attempted heist that we don't really know if it was clever because it failed before it started. A somewhat clever yet failed heist. And a not clever at all heist that is successful but happened before the other heists. And finally a final scene where all the actors get together and seem to have a party. There I just saved you 2 and a half boobless hours.
Forget that the actors seem like they showed up to this movie so they can hang out together and get a paycheck. Forget that it really isn't funny even when it tries to laugh at itself. Forget that the heists were not anywhere as creative or interesting as the first one. The plot in mathematical terms cancels itself out. WE start the movie because Benedict (the bad guy from the last movie) finds everybody and tells them that he wants his money back (he LITERALLY finds everybody, as in they showed us how he talked to everybody). Somehow he has gotten all their identities and it seems like someone ratted them out. So they have to go to europe perform a couple of heists to get the money to pay him back. Yuo got that so far? OK so they go to Europe and spend the first hour of the movie planning and executing the first heist. We then find out that that planning is pointless because the guy who ratted them has already done the first heist. He did this because he wants to prove himself the best thief so he issues them a challenge. A second heist. So they spenmd the whole next half hour planning another heist which fails before it starts and the half hour after that executing another heist which seems to fail. Then they pull the rug from under us by telling us that they already pulled the heist before they failed to execute the two heists that took up the second half of the movie. Therefore they made the entire second half of the movie completely pointless. This earlier heist happened the least clever way possible. So we get one clever yet failed heist. Another attempted heist that we don't really know if it was clever because it failed before it started. A somewhat clever yet failed heist. And a not clever at all heist that is successful but happened before the other heists. And finally a final scene where all the actors get together and seem to have a party. There I just saved you 2 and a half boobless hours.
posted by Oscar at 1:30 AM
1 Comments:
laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame. (the movie that is)
cheers
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